42 Comments
User's avatar
silrak's avatar

Did you get the job?

Larry Urish's avatar

No. And I wasn't exactly shocked ...

:)

silrak's avatar

AI doesn't have a sense of humor or else you would have gotten the job. Their lose. Nor doers it have intuition.

Larry Urish's avatar

The day AI gets intuition could be the beginning of the end ...

Not very optimistic ... and I hope that never happens.

CansaFis Foote's avatar

…it’s such a disease…we dehumanize each other every day with passion, acceptance, duty to our leadership, fault of creativity, and/or some i’d call dark myriad…no one should have to prove they are human, valuable as a human, real, really good, etc. to the dream of their own extinction…it can only get sunnier in philadelphia…and then the sun will do the rest…

Larry Urish's avatar

Agreed, CansaFis. We need to protect our flesh and blood ... our very humanity ... from the tech onslaught. Granted, the benefits of high tech are many, so we're talking about a double-edged sword here, but I'm a bit concerned about our future and AI. As they say: "More to be revealed..."

Matthew Gray's avatar

* The way you capture that sweaty, flustered human behind the screen versus the cool, detached bot is pitch-perfect.

Larry Urish's avatar

Thanks, Matthew. (By the way, I didn't get the job. Shocking, right??)

Rick Lewis's avatar

Read it to the whole family and they all laughed out loud. Thought you'd want to know the effect your authentic intelligence is having.

Larry Urish's avatar

I gotta come clean, Rick. I ran a few rough notes through ChatGPT, and this is what it came up with. (Sorry ... couldn't resist.)

Seriously, thank you for your support!

Brigitte Kratz's avatar

I was still trying to somehow pretend that THiS wasn’t already reality…and imagining what awaits today’s youth (as well as everyone else ofc) scares off my pants.

"[I got] ripped open by computer code that had mined my data and used it against me.” Yup, we’ve arrived in dystopia.

Larry Urish's avatar

Agreed! 👍🏻

James Bailey's avatar

Larry, what a terrific ride. I started this several days ago and wasn’t able to finish. I came back to it and started anew, and the ride you took me on was even better the second time.

What a bizarre experience and I just loved the choices you made when discovering yourself in the circumstance. Even better was the tale you crafted around it!

James Bailey's avatar

“And I kept thinking of this line - “However, that notion didn’t explain the gnawing ache in the pit of my stomach, my flushed face or my shaking hands, my body’s unconscious reaction to having been eviscerated, ripped open by computer code that had mined my data and used it against me.”

Argh!!!

Larry Urish's avatar

Thank you, James.

My first reply, which I made this morning, seems to have been swallowed up by the Digital Gods. So: I appreciate your feedback and support! The experience was, at the time, frustrating and somewhat horrific. It only became "grist for the humor mill" well after the fact. (Old saying: "Comedy is tragedy + time...")

And, yes, I did feel somewhat violated ... either by the AI bot mining my resume and LinkedIn profile, or *BY* my resume and LinkedIn profile.

By the way, I copied and pasted the entire essay into ChatGPT with the following prompt: "What do you think?"

The response brief: "Be afraid ... Be VERY afraid..." (Okay. I made that up.) Again, thank you for your kind support!

Bob Gilbreath's avatar

I hate the idea of AI interviews, but many human-given interviews are worse: arrive late, full of biases, talk more about themselves, etc.

Larry Urish's avatar

Bob, the bot who interviewed me sounded kinda sexy. I'm sorry I didn't ask her, "What are you wearing??"

Seriously, AI has extraordinary potential. My technophobic tendencies (and wholesale ignorance of all that is AI) obviously colored my take on what happened. I'm just concerned about what AI will do to creative thinkers, and their work, of every stripe. More to be revealed ... and thanks for reading my sordid tale of woe.

Bob Gilbreath's avatar

Thanks for taking this experiment for the team :). Now we know!

Norman T. Leonard's avatar

This is hysterical and horrifying. Which is a pretty good title. You might make this a series. Seek out opportunities to engage with AI and see if you can unnerve it as much as it unnerves us.

My wife refuses to give her order to the Taco Bell AI, which in her defense, talks aggressively loud. It also has a bloodless tone. Nobody should say "chalupa" with the voice of a corporate attorney.

Larry Urish's avatar

"Hysterical and horrifying" pretty much covers all bases, Norm.

About the ongoing AI series idea: The first draft of this essay included a back-and-forth dialogue with the bot that I *wished*would've happened but didn't. In this "hypothetical extension" of the job interview, I screwed with the bot in the same way I used to mess with telemarketers, with one goal: get *them* to hang up on *me*. But that early version was too "out there," even for folks of our twisted ilk.

≈ ≈ ≈

Spontaneous recommendation for sick minds, unrelated to the whole AI thing: Google "John Callahan cartoonist" and check out the images. If you haven't sampled this sick bastard's work, you're in for a few giggles.

Craig Reem's avatar

A machine replacing the brain? Never. I still remember that computer voice in "2001: A Space Odyssey." But I mostly remember it taking over. A superb take, Larry, from a human about, really humanity as we now live it.

Larry Urish's avatar

Thanks, Craig.

"2001" was prophetic, yes? I'd love to see that again. Will check on Netflix.

Rachel Parker's avatar

This was such an enjoyable read from start to finish. I laughed out loud more than once! Plus, I learned the origin of the term Luddites. Thanks for another great essay!

Larry Urish's avatar

Thanks, Rachel.

Any "LOL feedback" tossed in my orbit tells me that I'm doing something right! Much appreciated. :)

Christopher Harding's avatar

Thought provoking and funny.... a rare combo these days. Nicely done!

Larry Urish's avatar

Thank you, Chris.

And a friendly reminder: You expand the the vase story into a full-on post, and I'll write the story about my grandfather's gift, one I squandered. Deal??

Marie Friberger's avatar

This left me deeply disturbed and amused.

Need to make sure all future robots get a body so there is somewhere to aim the hammer.

Larry Urish's avatar

Thanks, Marie.

And I believe you just came up with a great TV game show idea: "Smash the bot!" (Please trademark that before *I* do!)

Marie Friberger's avatar

If I recall correctly, Spielberg’s A.I. from 2001 has some harrowing robot destruction scenes.

Larry Urish's avatar

I’ll have to watch that again.

Flori Posen's avatar

I was onboard from the very beginning and along for the ride. Once your mouth began actually speaking what your brain was thinking, I was openly laughing out loud and continued to do so until the end. Hysterical and relatable!!

Larry Urish's avatar

Thanks, Flori. It wasn't a barrel of laughs at the time, but, as the saying goes: "Comedy is tragedy + time." I appreciate your ongoing support!

Matt Cyr's avatar

Larry, please go do a follow up where you prep for fun. Before you even log in, you maximize for entertainment and laughs, job be damned. That would make for a very fun sequel. And to think, it might be what lands you the job. Human reads the transcripts before the final decision is made? Crazier things have happened. Never know when your humanity will shine through.

Larry Urish's avatar

Thank you, Matt.

Years ago, I actually thought of a story (novel? screenplay?) that focused on a job-search club. The ONLY purpose of the club was for all the members to screw with the job interviewer(s) and have as much fun as possible. Put your cowboy boots up on the hiring manager's desk? Check. Wear a wetsuit to the interview? Check. Answer every single question in Pig Latin? Check.

The original version of the essay you just read ended where I turn the tables and inundate the bot with a series of silly, rapid-fire questions with one goal: Make the bot blow a fuse and "hang up" on me, the way I used to get telemarketers to do the same. That early version was so over the top, a trusted friend urged me to not go there. (Translated: It was weird, even for me...)

Kathy Ayers's avatar

Epic. Off the chart hilarious yet a sci fi horror movie nicely rolled into one. Your ability to see a thing inside and out, find the outrage, shock, pain, irony and humor in it is staggering.

Btw, I caught something else. “I thought of happier times, scaling Mt Everest.”

That says a lot about what our technology is putting us through.

Larry Urish's avatar

Thank you, Kathy. To slightly twist the old saying: "Flattery will get you everywhere!"

I think we're both learning (the hard way, kicking and screaming) that the more we delve into deep wounds, the richer our recollection of life.

Let's keep digging. Always fun? HELL no. Worth the effort? Fuck yeah...

Kathy Ayers's avatar

100% yes.

Rob B's avatar

Loved the ball-peen hammer reference. A portable flame thrower by my side would be comforting.

Larry Urish's avatar

Understood.

During the bot interview, I honestly wanted to pummel my *own* laptop.